That sound you hear is my quiet sobbing.

24 hours ago, the Senators were outplaying the league-leading Red Wings, taking a 2-0 lead into the third (and frankly, that score flattered Detroit). All was well in the world.

Fast forward to today, when we have Heatley out for 4-6 weeks with a separated shoulder, Spezza out for something that looked suspiciously like a concussion (but, weirdly enough, might be his wrist. I don't know which to hope for!), a blown lead against Detroit that we just squeaked out as a win, and an annoying, penalty-riddled loss to the Islanders under our belt. Um. Great.

The one hope at this point is that Spezza isn't seriously injured. There just isn't enough offense to make up for the double blow of Heatley and Spezza -- Alfredsson is only one man, and Fisher won't maintain his recent pace forever. Vermette, Kelly and Donovan have provided a fat lot of nothing lately, but Paddock doesn't seem anxious to break them up (meanwhile, Christoph Schubert has been playing on the second line. Schubert, whose heart -- and, arguably, true talent -- is on D. I love Schubert endlessly, but come on. I swear, if Vermette was the only forward left on the team, Paddock would still pencil him in on the third line). Neil is Neil; McAmmond, bless him, has missed scoring chances at a pace to rival Chris Kelly. Robitaille will probably score two goals in February, to meet his monthly quota, but that's not very comforting right now.

Eaves should be back on Tuesday, and is apparently going to be gifted a top line role upon his return. That's good news in a way, except that I'm not sure I see the wisdom in throwing him into top line minutes in his first game back, since he's been out for the last thousand years. I also don't think it's particularly fair that no one who's played all this time gets a chance to step up instead, but Paddock works in mysterious ways.

On the bright side, at least we have something to talk about that isn't Gerber vs. Emery, Round 856322.

Insert standard blather about the stretches of silence. I've stopped feeling guilty about it!

Life in Sensland continued without me, obviously. Random thoughts, at the halfway mark:

• Emery can still be the #1, but he has to take the job back sooner rather than later. Emery's attitude gets him further than his sometimes questionable technical ability, and Emery needs to play a lot to get that attitude in full working order. Gerber's recent messes against the Capitals provided yet another prime opportunity (even if Gerber was backing up a bored, lazy team). It's time for Emery to run with it, because as much as I like Gerber, I have the sinking feeling that this team is going nowhere in the playoffs unless Emery gets his swagger back. Dedicating himself in practice is a good start.
  
• Emery and McGrattan are funny. The laziness in practice wasn't funny, but the scrap in practice? Kinda funny. The people who look at that as another example of Ray being a distraction and a problem are reading too much into it.
• Mike Fisher is overrated. Not because he's a bad player; these past few weeks, he's played extremely well. (Though, can he sustain that kind of offense over the course of a season? History says no, but we'll see.) No, he's overrated by the general fanbase, by whom he can do no wrong. There's a difference between admiration and blind devotion: the latter is annoying, but that's what I see with Fisher. I assume it's a remnant of those days of the "soft" Senators -- Mike Fisher, Our Hero, hits people. He isn't afraid to fight, he's a good grinder, and he's a two-way player. All very good, but I feel it's gone a little too far. Look at the front of Scotiabank Place, where a handful of players are featured. Alfredsson, obviously. Phillips, yes. Redden . . . embattled, but he still has an 'A,' and he's still one of the most recognizable players. Heatley, well, that makes sense; he's one of the star attractions. Finally, the obvious choice in Spe-- no, wait! It's MIKE FISHER. I can only assume it's because he's an Everyman -- he's devoted to Jesus, but still kills God's creatures in his spare time and has a Senators cover for his Bible (which, frankly? Disgusting); he's handsome enough for women to fall over him, but wholesome enough for men to like him without feeling threatened or gay; and he's all manly and "gritty." Fine, I accept all of that. It's like the people who appreciate Neil for what he does; I don't necessarily appreciate him, but I understand the love. But holding Fisher in greater esteem than someone like Spezza (and make no mistake, many people do)? Apologizing away his flaws, weaknesses, off games, poor playoff showings? (Showing up to the Finals made Fisher a "reliable playoff performer." While that's an excellent time to show up, it doesn't change his playoff history -- which, coincidentally, is just like his career history: streaky.) No, I don't get it. The Everyman HELPS to win Stanley Cups, no doubt, but as the Finals last year proved, the chances don't live and die by those kinds of players. Oh yeah, and it's still too much money.
  
• Call me crazy, but until the home and home against the Capitals, I barely noticed that Volchenkov was out. It's not so much a slight against him, as that I think Meszaros and Schubert, for the most part, were just fine in his absence.
  
• Jason Spezza is a motherfucking rock star.
  
• When Gerber is good, he is very very good.
  
• Corvo has been mildly less horrifying this year! Decent, even! His self-confidence has clearly improved, because he doesn't spiral into a week of depression every time he gives away the puck.
  
• I have no real problems with Richardson, Donovan, and Robitaille, but I have to admit, I often forget they exist. I'm not so sure that's a compliment . . .
• Did I mention up there that I don't fully appreciate Chris Neil? This year, I really don't appreciate Chris Neil. Dropping the invisibility cloak just long enough to take a stupid penalty is NOT what people mean when they say that Neil is an example of a goon becoming a real player in the new NHL. The longer he's played a top six/top nine role, the more confused he seems to be about what kind of player he is. Here's a hint, Chris: NOT OFFENSIVE.
• Nick Foligno and Cody Bass have been pleasant surprises! Nikulin is a pleasant surprise too, but mostly for his blog, so far.
• I have nothing else to say about the way we've handled Vermette.
• To the surprise of no one, Alfredsson and Phillips continue to be their wonderful, magical selves. I'm a little worried about how much we've played Alfredsson, but he seems to be having fun, so I hope that he can hold up to it.
  
• The evolution of Dany Heatley, Functional All-Around Player continues apace.
• The jury is still out on Paddock. Sometimes I agree with him, sometimes he makes me want to cry. The team under him has been sometimes brilliant, sometimes lazy and disinterested. I'm willing to believe that they've struggled with the importance of this regular season bullshit, when what they really want is to get back to the playoffs and get to work. I sympathize! But that's not how it works, so developing some better work habits in time for the playoffs would be lovely.

ELSEWHERE

• The Flyers terrify me. I'm not kidding, I don't care if we lose when we play them. I just want everyone to get out in good health. That's a ridiculous thing to have to say.
• The "parity" in the East is just a nice way of saying that 95% of the teams are mediocre-to-shitty.
• The Winter Classic would have been a great event, without the Penguins and the Sabres. (I may be somewhat biased.)
• Brandon Bochenski has found yet another home. This is only significant because I'm still glad I was right about him when he was in Ottawa. Scoring is great, but when you can't (or won't try to) contribute in any other way, your future in this league is not bright. Also, a monkey could score from Spezza's wing.
• The resurgence of the Blackhawks organization is the feel-good story of the year, hands down. I just wish they were on my TV more often! Which is really just a wish for Centre Ice, but still.
  
  
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  Now playing: Iron & Wine - Beneath the Balcony
  via FoxyTunes
  

The FoxyTunes feature changes everything, though.

It seems I was less ready to get back to this than I thought I was. "Inexcusable absence" might as well be the name of the blog instead of the name of a tag. Oh well; I am effectively talking to myself here, so does it really matter? No, no it does not.

The Sens' season is off to a surprisingly good start. Surprising to me, at least -- not that I'm a doubter (er, much), but does anyone really expect to start a season 5-0? Standouts in a good way are: Alfredsson, whose stellar play has rolled right over from the playoffs; Vermette, who is shooting more, steadier on his skates and harder to knock off the puck, and looks as if he'll get a spot in the top six if it kills him; Kelly, who . . . is scoring, and I still don't know how; and above all, GERBER, who has played out of his mind and reclaimed most of his dignity. Thankfully.

Some other people are middling. Spezza had a mind-blowing pre-season, literally skating circles around the opposition (hey there, Toronto!). Seven games into the regular season, he looks more like Spezza 1.5, the version who racks up points and is occasionally amazing, but leaves the impression that he's trying too hard. It's occurred to me that having a pylon play with Heatley and Spezza might not be a bad thing after all, since Spezza is more likely to be selfish and shoot when he doesn't have Alfie there to complete the playmaker's wet dream. It doesn't really matter for the moment, since the big line is producing nicely despite Jason's glaring 0G, and since Jason seems to be fed up with this business, and has been shooting the last couple of games seemingly out of spite.

Fisher's mostly been a non-factor, which is equal parts fine and worrying. I don't expect Fisher to become anything he's not just because he signed a fat contract. However, I am afraid that with another year of Fisher's inability to provide consistent secondary scoring, I'll start looking at that contract and wondering if it isn't expendable. That's where I ended up with Schaefer last year, but Schaefer actually wanted to leave, so no harm, no foul. Fisher, though . . . yeah, I don't know.

That said, I don't want to come down too hard on Fisher until I see him with better linemates. The Foligno-Fisher-Eaves line had less than nothing doing, and when that line was granted a mercy killing, Fisher ended up with . . . Foligno and Neil. Um, yeah. I'm mildly concerned that Paddock considers that his second line, but with Vermette, Kelly and Eaves looking good, that would be nonsensical. Not that that always deters the coaching staff, but I'm willing to wait and see.

Who else? Redden has improved some, but too often looks painfully uncertain, still; Foligno is allowed to be mediocre, because he's a rookie, and I'll forgive kids for being kid-like until they're 25; Eaves played well after lining up with Vermette and Kelly, so here's hoping that his crappy line was bringing him down earlier; Schubert and Vermette may have to conspire to force the coaching staff to play them in their rightful positions; and Neil has to play on the fourth line. Please. PLEASE. We've tried hard enough for long enough; he doesn't belong anywhere else.

Otherwise, the best news by a mile is that McAmmond participated in a full practice, and is nearing return. It may not seem possible for a 6-1 team to miss someone dearly, but trust me, the Senators miss McAmmond dearly. Emery is supposedly ready to come back this week too, but he could be in tough. Another debate for another day.

Otherwise x2, there's a chance -- not a big chance, but a chance -- that I'll litter this place with pointless thoughts over the next couple of weeks, since the Senators only have three lousy games in the last half of the month. Ridiculous. The only halfway-cheery thing to come of this is that they're going on a team-building resort: if they provide enough pictures and stupid stories, I'll maybe forgive the NHL. Maybe.

ELSEWHERE

- Two big supsensions for two phenomenally stupid Flyers. I'm not convinced that the suspensions will make anyone think twice about anything, and I'm not satisfied that shoulder-to-head hits are still perfectly legal. For the time being, I'm satisfied enough that the league has a policy that they're actually enforcing. I suppose murkier hits will be the true test, though.

- Havlat is out again. The innocuous way in which he fucked up that shoulder makes me very nervous for the longevity of his career, but I guess you never know; he could turn around and play injury-free hockey for years. What's really uplifting is seeing the Blackhawks play well without him -- two comebacks on Detroit! It's a fragile house of cards to be sure, but if Havlat deserves a string of healthy years, then God knows that Hawks fans deserve a genuinely competitive team. I'll be pulling for them.

- It's early, but things seem to be going poorly for Anaheim and Pittsburgh. I have nothing further to say on the subject, which you can tag as "karma, fear of." On the other hand, things seem to be going swimmingly for Carolina. Ugh. (There is some solace to be had in the fact that hard as he tries, Eric Staal still can't grow the beginnings of a respectable beard.)

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Now playing: Matthew Good Band - Whispering in the Dark
via FoxyTunes

Eyes to the horizon.

If abandoning a blog in the middle of a breathless playoff run isn't the way to kill potential traffic, I don't know what is. I was too swept up, too distracted, too superstitious (and at times, too lazy) to wade back in with the playoffs ongoing.

You can imagine why I didn't want to dive back in after the playoffs, I'm sure. But even heartbreak and disappointment step aside after a while; no one forgets, but there's a new season coming. I think I'll tinker with this place, and start all over again too.

. . .

Ottawa 5, New Jersey 4
(Ottawa leads series 1-0)

This is delayed reaction of the worst kind, but two days later I still don't know what to say about that game. Show me the person who expected Brodeur to let in four goals in the first, regardless of his struggles against TB. Now show me the person who expected the Sens to do their best to squander a four-goal lead on the Devils. Oh no, wait -- I can see that person any day in the mirror. "SENATORS!!!" often doubles as a swear word around here.

To the Senators' credit, they actually pulled out one of those cringe-inducing, "oh my god what is wrong with this team?!" games. They weren't the team who walked away from a crazy one looking dazed and disheartened, as they have too many times in the past. For all the comparisons to last year's opener against Buffalo, this was more like the games at the beginning of this season, when the Sens would build a lead and then, showing zero faith in their ability to keep it, would sit back and watch it dwindle away.

This is not that team. It's still far too early to know how this series will go, and they had some games late in the season that suggested they hadn't changed at all . . . but somehow, I feel the change. "Not the same Senators" is an oft-repeated phrase right now, and there is plenty of room to argue that we can't know that for sure, not yet. But, but.

Something about them is different. Muckler, and some media guys like Greg Millen, have called it a "business-like" attitude. I don't know what I'd call it, exactly, but I know I've felt a sweeping change in the team, slowly but surely. People point to the injuries at Christmas, and yes, that was a big step. Before that, when they halted their first horrific slide of the year against the most unlikely team in the Sabres, and the bench exploded like they'd just won an OT game in the playoffs. I think it goes back past that too. I usually attribute it to what I consider to be the new core, the young core of former B-Sens who grew up together in this organization, and are still growing. But now it doesn't seem to be a replacement or a new era as much as a comfortable merge.

Funnily enough, Alfredsson played down the importance of chemistry in the room [when talking about moves for trade deadline acquisitions], but Spezza has come back to it again and again. The room is tighter than it's ever been; they're committed to playing for one another. They're different. And I believe him. As badly as I want them to go deep this year, I will believe him no matter what happens.

Game Notes

PROS

• Jason Spezza got the call for the last faceoff of the game. Jason Spezza, who delights in his defensive responsibilities. Jason Spezza, who is an endless source of pride for me these days.
• They never gave up the lead. It's hard to type that and not burst out laughing, but it's true! They came perilously close, but they held on when it really counted. Rust, uncertainty, complacency -- whatever it was, it was a win. I constantly write "K-I-L-L-E-R I-N-S-T-I-N-C-T" in my notes as a plea/demand, and so far, they've more or less delivered.
  
• Dany Heatley has joined the team! Judging by his skating, that week off did wonders for him.
  
• Vermette continued his dominance in the faceoff circle, going 9-4 for 69%. A bright spot for a line that didn't have the best game.
  

CONS

• Volchenkov and Phillips. Jersey is not Pittsburgh. I swear, if Volchenkov is the next defenceman lost to confidence issues, I'm going to petition for a therapist on the bench.
  
• Comrie took dumb penalties, committed dumb turnovers, and had a crappy game in general. As a result, the second line was not great. I expect Comrie to come back with a good game, but Fisher and Schaefer really have to create.
  
• Emery made a few good saves, but he also let in a stinker or two. That's disappointing, because in his short history, he's played Jersey well. His injury situation is a question mark, but honestly, if he's in, he just HAS to be better. The team may be different, but they're still human. They get off their game when they're worried about goaltending. None of that, please.
• Chris Neil looked like he was skating in molasses for much of the night. Murray did keep Neil on the bench for the last five minutes (along with Saprykin and Comrie), but the Devils exposed him all game. At least speed-wise, he is the clear weak link on the third line; if I'm Murray, I seriously consider flipping someone from the fourth line to the third. The team rolls four lines anyway, so Neil's ice time would barely suffer. We'll see.
• The second unit PP still sucks. Schaefer's come off it in the playoffs and Neil's been added, but nope. With the exception of Comrie, it still sucks.
  
• The late goal in the first set the table for the mess in the second. Late goals are the devil; everyone knows this! (Er, terrible pun unintended.)
  

Last Note

I appreciated the derision in Pierre McGuire's voice last night when he noted Avery's "embellishment." Adoring the Sabres as he does, he should recognize a quality dive from a mile away.

Can't even call this "under the wire."

Buffalo/NYR has started as I type, but miscellaneous notes from the first round, better late than never:

1. I had my doubts about Vancouver, but good for them for clawing their way back in game seven. If nothing else, Luongo deserved to have the team in front of him show up and play. I admit that it wasn't the most watchable series for me, but there's still a certain compelling beauty in a goaltender's duel.
   
2. On that note, Marty Turco should have dispelled all doubts about him as a playoff performer. I really like Turco, so as ugly as it was to see the Canucks squander a 3-1 series lead, a situation where he was redeemed and the Canucks still pulled it out was ideal. (It is all about me, of course.)
3. The Predators combined sub-par hockey with highly questionable behaviour to earn the honour of being the Official Embarrassment of the First Round. Sorry Flames; better luck next year.
4. Gary Galley held my attention in the Jersey/Tampa series moreso than the actual hockey. I love Galley. He's well spoken, emotional but rational, and he's never too big a homer, even when he's on the local Sens broadcast. His colour commentary blows Gord Wilson's shrieking right out of the water. I'd miss Gary from the Sens games, but he likely will earn a national stage in the near future. Good for him.
5. In other commentator news: Glenn Healy did not elevate his game for the playoffs (suprise!); I can tolerate Greg Millen when he's not drooling on the Flames, so I didn't have too many problems with him alongside (the alarmingly senile, but affable) Bob Cole; I would listen to Kelly Hrudey talk about the weather; and I expect Pierre McGuire to spontaneously combust with joy during a Sabres broadcast. Any day now.
6. I blinked and missed the Thrashers/Rangers games. I got the sense that the near-frenetic instability around the Thrashers overshadowed great hockey from the Rangers, so I'm looking forward to seeing what the Rangers bring in the second round. (When I'm done here, I'll turn on the TV and find out!)
7. I also blinked and missed the Ducks/Wild series. Unfortunately, I still can't bring myself to care. Sabres/Isles was not much better.
   
8. Martin Brodeur is a little chubby (by hockey standards) to be making a frozen pizza commercial. Just saying.

Round Two

Senators/Devils will clog up this space for the foreseeable future -- and I think my preference is clear -- but the rest:

Buffalo Sabres vs. New York Rangers
This should be interesting! I don't know how much I'll be able to watch, since I'm only rooting for the Rangers as the lesser of two evils. But with the posturing already begun, it's sure to be more entertaining than the Sabres/Isles series. I just hope that if the Rangers can't beat the Sabres, they at least give Buffalo a good challenge. (I'm sure I asked exactly the same thing of the Islanders, but maybe the Rangers can actually deliver?)

Anaheim Ducks vs. Vancouver Canucks
Brian Burke comes "home"! Drama! Intrigue! Okay, maybe not, but I feel that Luongo and the Canucks can take this, especially if fatigue doesn't catch up to them. Yes, the Ducks have rest on their side, but the Canucks have momentum.

San Jose Sharks vs. Detroit Red Wings
Tough one. Top to bottom, I like the Sharks. I like the way they play, I like they way they handle themselves on and off the ice, I love the way the organization is run. On the other hand, I hate the Red Wings . . . but I'm happy to see Bertuzzi in the playoffs again, and winning. I prefer the Sharks in the end (and think they probably will make it through in six or seven), but I'd really like to see Bertuzzi (and guys like Dan Cleary) have a strong round despite that.


Last Note

I've maintained that I would root for anyone in a Team Canada jersey, but Colby Armstrong?! That is unnecessarily cruel.

Date with the Devils

So, it will be the Devils for round two. I don't know if there was a good news/bad news scenario, considering the way Lundqvist and the Rangers have played, so . . . it's acceptable news, I guess? "I am afraid of Martin Brodeur" is the extent of my analysis so far.

Well, that, and I know I don't want Murray to try reconfigured lines to "spread the offence." The offence is spread and the chemistry is set; let's go with that to start and see how it works.

Oh, there's also this little matter:

Sportsnet.ca -- Ottawa Senators goaltender Ray Emery left Monday's practice early, after blocking a shot from a teammate.

After practice, both Emery and head coach Bryan Murray downplayed the incident, although the netminder smashed his stick over the goalpost in frustration at one point during practice.

When addressing the media afterwards, Emery said he was not injured and plans to be in net for Game 1 against New Jersey.

Yeah, that's not funny. In fact, I might cry. Please, please, PLEASE let him be okay.

Okay, I'm off to remind myself how to breathe. Summation of thoughts from round one tomorrow, after the Canucks decide whether or not they want to rely on Luongo for goaltending and offence for the third straight game.